#ON2THENEXTONE

i feel like i need to write...about what thou...like so oo much shit on my brain...it the begining of December and i recently got fired 4 not bein able 2 control my temper! i mean i was kinda fed up with the job anyways but was lookin and tryin 2 hold on to it until i found sumthin else...im feelin even worst then what i was feelin wen i had the job cuz im not gonna be able 2 get the gifts i wanna get 4 my pplz! fuck it! on 2 the next one!
My music career is movin slow as usual i feel as thou sumtimes all this hard work and money time bein put into this is gonna be all in vein!but i cant give up on it its like im so in love and have such passion 4 it i cant let it go...im like that wit alot of things...which leads me on 2 the next one...
My girl and i do a lot of arguin...i dont put blame on eitha side sumtimes i jus feel as thou we're not meant 2 be but our time spent 2gether makes me feel so fuckin good and happy but @ the same time the trust issue i feel is neva gonna go away...i really jus wanna make her happy and secure...n even thou we aren't on the same page cuz ive told her those words that comes from a warm place inside me n am by my lonely here (which REALLY DOESNT bother me now)but it makes it nearly impossible 2 even think about movin on 2 the next one...
A lot of ppl tell me i shud be thankful and happy 4 still bein able 2 have and make choices and that im still young well im 21 and a lot of times im not happy w.the choices and my current position in life...howeva i kno and always keep in mind that theres NOTHING i cud EVA do 2 CHANGE THE PAST! so i jus live 2day 4 2day and jus try and hope i make 2day the best i can so that 2morrow (if it comes) will be better...and wen im on 2 the next one 2morrow hopfully will be the 2morrow where i cud call my moms (Victoria Walker my heart and everything 4 which i am and live 4) and tell her that im makin her dream come tru and buyin her a house 2morrow and that my sisters (Sonjia, Shantell, & Samantha) and brother (Ronnie) newphews (Ty'shon & Kalib) and nicees (Ronni & Rianna) will have no more worries cuz their brother and uncle is makin sure they live good and anytime they thought about movin on 2 the next one wudnt really be a thought jus WHEN and WHERE...but im on 2 the next one...